Updated: Jul 29, 2020
I love being a woman and I’m even more proud to be a black woman. I come from a long line of tall, beautiful, educated, artistic, spiritual and loving women. Women who believed in raising their daughter to cook, clean, run a house, raise children, teach Sunday school, maintain loving relationships, the list goes on and on. What I was not equipped for is being a woman in 2020.
I won’t sugar coat this: It’s hard being a woman in 2020, but for reasons that I think will surprise you.
I have found that the idea of womanhood has been greatly altered. Femininity no longer includes words like gentleness, empathy, sensitivity and humility. In fact, to many those words are only synonyms for weakness. Sexual exploitation is the new standard of femininity. Women willingly participate in exploiting female sexuality, and erroneously call it taking back their power.
And where has this power led us to with men? Nowhere! I haven’t met a man yet who considered a half-dressed woman powerful.
So, where then does that leave me and other women who don’t subscribe to this narrative? Do we change our ideals to reflect the mindset of today’s society? I have found that speaking up for my beliefs automatically turns people into bullies. (Because in 2020, people aren’t allowed to disagree with you and still be identified as a human being with feelings.)
Although this is my experience, I am hopeful that things can change. I look forward to the day when people understand the strength in being quiet, even when you’re right. Or being able to empathize with people, even when you disagree. More importantly, I sincerely wait for the day that kindness and humility is a standard of not only being a woman; but being a human being.