Forgive Them EveryDay...

Updated: Dec 16, 2020




So last night I had dinner with a buddy who recently finalized his divorce… Married ten and a half years, one amazing son, but now left with mixed feelings on how to move forward… The divorce wasn’t his idea nor his desire, so there are days in which he finds himself angry with her… Angry because he invested almost eleven years into something that feels like she threw away in eleven hours… Angry because their son is now split between two homes… Angry because he still wants her, but she doesn’t want him… So as I sat there and watched him melt, I asked “Have you forgiven her?” and he responded “For some things, Yes… For others, No…”. So in actuality, he hasn't forgiven her… You see forgiveness is a 100% thing, not a 70/30… You’ve either forgiven or you haven’t…


Trust me when I say, some people have committed numerous crimes towards us… Depending on how long we’ve known him/her; the depth of the relationship determines the amount of crimes committed or the depth of pain they may have caused us. But where many of us go wrong and later question as to why we’re still chained to this person(s) is we never fully forgive… We forgive for the small things and hold on to the bigger things, or we just don’t forgive at all… Some of you wonder why every time someone is mentioned, you feel some kind of way… You’re no longer upset, but for whatever reason when you’re in their presence or hear their name, feelings you didn’t realize exist rise… And to be honest, it’s because you haven’t forgiven them…. Deeply buried within you is the evidence of their crimes… You never grieved over their actions, you just buried them… You buried them with new relationships, cars and clothes, food, drugs and alcohol… You distracted yourself with the external, but never dealt with the internal… Because of this, there’s a cancer lying dormant within you that comes alive with each encounter involving him/her…


What I know for sure is… There are some people you will have to intentionally forgive each and every day until you've rid yourself of him/her… It will take time and energy to let go of what happened... It may have been years since the crime was committed, but you will still need to speak their name and forgive them… Sure they’ve probably moved on with their lives, but you haven’t… You’re still chained to them or the moment in which you were hurt by them.. So forgive them today… Forgive them tomorrow… Forgive them next week, month, and even next year if that’s how long it takes… You’ve live far too long in the shadows of the pain they’ve caused you, let go of it by forgiving them… You were made to be free, not a slave to anyone or anything… Free yourself by freeing them of the crime that has imprisoned you…. I know you may feel as though they don't deserve to be forgiven, but do you deserve it??? Forgiving isn't for them, it's for the freeing of YOU... YOU GOT THIS!!!


Coming 01.01.2021



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© 2020  by John Patrick Adams