Overcoming Trust Issues...




Will I ever trust again” lurks deep in the minds of many people today. At some point they were hurt, broken, disappointed, or possibly betrayed by someone in which they never imagined would do something so horrific. Left with residues of hurt and shame, unhealed wounds, and a lack of confidence in people, all present and future relationships/encounters are haunted by memories of previous pain.

So how do you overcome trust issues? Well, I’m going to give you two points I’ve found to be very helpful on my journey…

Trust People: Now this one is just plain out simple… “TRUST PEOPLE TO BE WHO THEY ARE”… Never set expectations for others to let you down. Let them be who they are and allow their actions to tell you who they are. If someone has proven he/she is a liar, TRUST THEM to be a liar… If someone has proven he/she can’t be trusted, TRUST THEM to let you down if you don’t believe their actions… People tell us over and over again who they are, but because we don’t want to believe it, we overlook their truth until it becomes our hurt….

Trust YOURSELF: Now this one is quite complex, but I’m going to be quick… Most of our trust issues are internal… Of course there were actions by an external force, but it is completely “internal” that created the issue… So why do I say this? Well, because we let OURSELVES down…. At some point we were vulnerable, hoping for the best in someone else, naïve, dumb and in love, and because of all of these things; we ignored the signs slapping us in the face. I like to call it “The Little Red Riding Hood Syndrome”… You see there’s no way in hell she didn’t realize there was a wolf lying there in the bed… He was hairy, eyes were big as hell, and you know his voice sounded nothing like her grandmothers. BUTTT because he was in G-Ma’s bed, she over looked the obvious… Just as this is a “story”, many of you were living in a “story” when you were let down. Sadly to say, happily ever after wasn’t written at the end of your story…

For years you’ve blamed someone else for how you feel; being hurt, and cheated on…. Most time there’s smoke before the fire, but we ignore it… And people we have to get to a place we realize that smoke is a sign we’re about to get burned… You ignored the signs and because you did you were burned badly and you never healed from it… You’ve been carrying around luggage of hurt, pain, brokenness, betrayal, and anger far too long… It’s time you forgive yourself for taking on the role of the fool, being caught off guard, and staying longer than you should have… We’ve all been there, you’re not exempt… Until you forgive yourself, you’re always going to have this problem…

So here are a few things to work on.

  • Trust yourself enough to NOT doubt if what you’re feeling is right…

  • Trust yourself to HAVE YOUR OWN BACK….

  • Trust yourself to know when someone is doing something that clearly goes against your morals, beliefs, and desires.

  • Trust yourself to know your self-worth…

  • Trust yourself to NOT stay in a relationship that’s adding no value to you…

  • Trust yourself NOT to be vulnerable to falling into a relationship just because you want one…

  • Trust yourself to know WHEN IT’S TIME TO WALK AWAY…

What I know for sure is…. Until you trust yourself to have your back, YOU WON’T TRUST ANYONE ELSE TO HAVE IT…


Check out this week's BLC Podcast "Aloha Mr. President"



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